Solving presidential problems

"I can't go to my own barbershop now. I've got to have my barber come to some undisclosed location to cut my hair." --Barack Obama

Bill Clinton recommends just having him brought out to Air Force One while it sits on the runway making hundreds miss their connections. And remember to tip the barber REAL well. :-)

Turning up the heat with cold

Hey how about them Ruskies, eh? I'm sitting here less than an hour drive from the Czech border, and ol' Ivan has turned off their heat! Russia shut down the gas pipeline to most of eastern Europe today. The last few days in these parts have been bitter cold (lemme tell you!), but some of the affected countries are looking at 7 days of gas reserves before there ain't no more. I know some Russians who are real nice folks, but their leaders are some kind of scum, with malice on their calculating little minds. Mark my words, the Cold War (no pun intended) never really went away and you and I will see the Bear and the Eagle going head to head again before all is said and done.

The supervolcano next door

Anyone paying attention to the swarm of several hundred earthquakes in Yellowstone National Park since Christmas? Just wondering. It is a supervolcano, after all, and, well, it might spoil the Ursenbach reunion this year to have the picnic tables shaking and all.